


In the Silence

by Charlie9646



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: A slice of life, AU, Anal Sex, Anger, Angst and Fluff, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bigotry, Epilogue What Epilogue, Established Relationship, F/M, Marriage, Mentions of transapobic behavior, Oral Sex, Pansexual Remus Lupin, Porn With Plot, Remus Lupin Lives, Smut, Trans woman Hermione, transgender character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-18
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:08:23
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27610474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlie9646/pseuds/Charlie9646
Summary: Remus and Hermione Lupin had the life that they wanted, even if they both had not reached this moment without some scars. Sometimes you just have to do your best to forget things and live in the moment.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Remus Lupin
Comments: 6
Kudos: 27
Collections: Truth or Dare?





	In the Silence

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [Truth_or_Dare](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/Truth_or_Dare) collection. 



> **Prompt:**
> 
> Dare: (Task) Write a fic featuring a character that has a 'calm' anger
> 
> Thank you to my beta who for now will remain nameless

“Come here,” Remus said, his voice rising at the end, losing the authority in the command.

Perching herself on the arm of his worn fireside chair, Hermione peered down at him through a curtain of curls and smiled. Remus pulled her down into a kiss, his hand going into her tresses. His lips tasted like his tea and something that was just so utterly him. Her fingers twisting into his shirt, tugging him closer to her as she settled more comfortably into his lap. 

Pulling away he gazed up at her in revery, “What did I do to deserve you?” he asked, huskily.

“It’s not about deserving, Remus,” Hermione sighed. “You just live your life and maybe, just possibly, you find someone someday and you fall in love with them. Some people are lucky enough to truly and totally love more than one person in their life. I know I am not your first, but I hope to be your last.” 

She tilted her head to better take in the face of the man in front of her. Deep brown eyes keenly taking in every line. Her fingertips lightly brushed the stubble on his chin. Her eyes followed the path of her fingers, noticing his whiskers were speckled with white and grey. She traced a still bright pink scar that sliced across his cheek. Time and life had not been kind to Remus Lupin. 

“I love you,” he whispered, kissing her once again. Breaking away only to pull her shirt over her head and toss it aside. 

They both needed this. They needed this like they needed air in their lungs and magic in their veins. Remus’ hardened cock was pressing against her core. His rough hands holding onto her tightly. Hermione made quick work of his buckle and zipper before freeing him from the confines of his trousers. Moving to the bed might have been more comfortable but Hermione was so wrapped up in Remus that she barely cared to notice. Remus clearly felt the same as he shed himself of his shirt 

The strain of her insistent arousal against the zipper of her jeans was easily ignored as Hermione slipped from Remus’ lap. She landed softly on her knees at his feet as though ready to worship in prayer at his altar. She grasped his hardness in one of her delicate hands and pumped her hand along his length. She gathered the precum leaking from the straining head of his cock with the pad of his thumb, making his hips buck. On a downward stroke of her hand, she took him into her mouth. Her cheeks hollowed as she bobbed her head to keep time with her hand. A moan escaping from his lips above her, his hands going to her curls, tightening down and tangling into them. Hermione’s free hand cupped his balls, rolling them gently while one knuckle brushed behind them. Remus’ tight grip on her wild mane was bordering on painful as she continued to work him. 

“I...I want you Hermione, I want to be inside of you…” Remus cried, clenching his teeth trying to gain back control of himself. “Fuck, love, I want to fuck you.”

Dragging her lips from around his cock, she leaned back on her heels and laughed, “Aren’t you doing that right now?”

“You know what I mean, witch, so stop teasing me,” his hooded amber eyes narrowing as he stared down at her. “Bed or here?” 

“Bed,” she answered, though she didn’t move a single muscle, a sultry smile tugging at her lips. 

He leaned down and growled into her ear. “Get on with it and take off those jeans, would you?”

“You would like that, wouldn’t you?” she teased, causing him to grumble under his breath. 

She stood up and made her way to their bedroom, knowing that he would follow. She held back a smile when his strong arms snaked around her waist. His fingertips skimmed the curve of her neck as he pushed her locks aside. He traced electrifying kisses over the exposed skin of her shoulder.. Nipping and sucking at the column of her neck in the places that drove her wild. Hermione was held firmly against his body as he hooked his thumbs into her belt loop. She pushed her jean clad arse against his throbbing cock tantalisingly. 

“You enjoy teasing me, don’t you?” Remus murmured, against her neck, sending shivers up and down her spine. 

His rough fingers traced patterns on the smooth skin of her torso, each pass creating sparks. Spinning around Hermione crashed their lips together, her fingers knotting into the hair at the nape of his neck. In a frantic tangle of heated passion, they made their way clumsily to their bedroom. The light from the setting sun made Remus’s scars stand out in sharp contrast to his otherwise smooth skin. He hated them, every single one. She knew it was because of his disgust in himself. His revulsion at what they represented about him. 

But Hermione loved them. Every single bloody one. They were Remus’s history carved into his skin. They were proof that he had overcome every hardship life threw his way. 

Reaching out for her husband once more, smiling and closing her eyes. She focussed on regaining control of her senses. All Remus’ teasing aside he understood that letting him see her like this wasn’t easy. She was not just laying her body bare, but her soul too. No matter how much she knew Remus loved her, Hermione always struggled with being so vulnerable. She thought back to their first time together, all those years ago, when his words had been like a balm to her. 

“I don’t care, Hermione. I don’t care about the parts that someone has,” he had assured. “They aren’t why I love someone or why I want to fuck them. They just are. It’s like some people have brown hair and some people have black? That’s exactly how I feel about it.”

Her heart fluttered just remembering those words. The kindest words anyone, man, woman or beast, had ever uttered to Hermione in all her days. How she had known, then and there, that Remus Lupin was the man she would spend the rest of her life with. There had been a weight lifted off her at those words. Hermione knew that she didn’t need a man to feel accepted. But she was still human, she wanted to be wanted. She wanted to be loved. She wanted to never again have any man look at her the way Ronald Weasley had.

Remus unbuttoned and unzipped her jeans, tugging them down her legs and helping her step out of them. 

“Come to bed with me, love,” his voice filling with his arousal, rough, but also gentle. “Do you want to do this?”

“Yes,” Hermione whispered. “I do.” 

She tugged down the duvet, Remus joining her. He grabbed the condom and lube tossing them on the bed. There was a comfort and practice to their movements. His fingers inside her, stretching her, causing her to plead for more. Remus pressing small butterfly kisses to the column of her throat, “Merlin, you’re wonderful, do you know that? So utterly…”

Pulling him down to meet her lips effectively shutting him up. Her tongue slipped inside his mouth, her nails dug into his back. Remus wrapped his hand around his prick lining up with her entrance, easing his way inside of her. His scarred hand grabbed onto Hermione’s hips pulling them gently closer together. Her thighs gripped his trying desperately to encourage him to move. But, he ignored the silent request as if he was simply savouring the connection of their bodies. 

This strange dance between them, the firm thrusts of his body against her, sending waves of arousal through Hermione with each press of his prick against that spot inside of her...The one turning her vision white, causing her limbs to shake. It was like magic. It was like nothing else mattered or would ever again. 

Moans of his pleasure joining her whines and hisses, those of which she barely knew that she was making. Remus came, a hand tightening down on her hip surely leaving a bruise and the other twisted into her curls. Hermione followed soon after, leaving the rather uncomfortable sticky residue on her belly. 

They had their routine down when it came to this. He wordlessly handed her a flannel, not helping, not touching the part of her body that she tried her best to be indifferent to. Some men found her fascinating, enthralling because of this simple default in biology. Not Remus, it didn’t matter to him. Her penis was about as important to her as her elbow. It functioned as it should and it just existed, which was fine for now. Someday that might change and there were options when it did. The worst part for Hermione was not the body that housed her mind and soul as it had once been, but the opinions of others. Not unlike how her husband felt once he could afford the Wolfsbane potion monthly with ease. 

“What’s wrong?” Remus asked, turning to face her once she had joined him under the covers. 

“I was just thinking,” Hermione murmured, tucking her folded hands under her head. “About things I shouldn’t be.”

His fingers traced random patterns over the skin at her ribs. “Fun things?” 

She laughed. “Wouldn’t that be so much better? But no, my mind is rarely ever that kind to me.”

“Mrs. Lupin,” he teased. “Has anyone ever told you that you think far too much?”

“Possibly,” Hermione quipped. “Though can we be serious for a moment? 

“I am sorry, go on.”

“Remember Nott?”

  
  
“Vaguely,” Remus said, shrugging his shoulders. “He was in your year, I believe?” 

“Yes, he’s our new hire in my department and decided he had every bloody right to walk up to me and ask, Does Professor Lupin take it up the arse or do you?”

“For the love of Merlin,” he hissed. “Why can’t they keep their stupid noses out of other people’s business? I hope you told him exactly where he could shove it…”

Hermione found herself laughing. Because if she didn’t laugh, she’d cry. Even Remus did not fully understand.. The kind of that left you stomping around and screaming? It wasn’t something most people would understand coming from her. No matter how she worded it... No matter how she dressed it up, people couldn’t get it. Witch or wizard, man or woman, they couldn’t easily put themselves in her shoes. 

They couldn’t understand that you had to blend in, that you had to work twice as hard, have skin twice as thick. That the barbs and arrows hurled at her when anyone found out her past were targeting any chinks in her armour. It didn’t matter that some cis women had deep voices, or large hands and feet, or even were tall. It didn’t matter if she “passed” as stupid as that word sounded. Some would still never believe she was who she said she was. 

“My supervisor told me to report him, but honestly? I didn’t bother. It's not like they did anything the last ten times someone did something like this so why would they now? It shouldn’t even bother me now, but it does. If I scream at him? That is going to give the bastard exactly what he wants the bloody attention, so he can tell his stupid friends just how manish I look because I simply exist.” 

“I am sorry,” Remus murmured. “Is there anything I can do?”

“No, there isn’t. Sometimes I just need to be mad.”

“You have every right to be angry.”

“Thank you,” she said. Together they sat there a healing silence. They would face each tomorrow side by side. All she could hope was that each day would be better than the last. 


End file.
